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Hi, I’m April. My tumblr game is old as balls. I’m a menace. var sc_project=9360824; var sc_invisible=1; var sc_security="a06f04e4"; var scJsHost = (("https:" == document.location.protocol) ? "https://secure." : "http://www."); document.write("");

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    Mnb does this shit on purpose. I was juuuuust about to go to sleep. Now I can’t. Can I?

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    Bruce Willis is probably going to keep making action movies because you know what they say about old habits


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    "I don’t need marriage. I don’t need anyone to take care of all my needs and desires. I can take care of them myself now." Mindy Kaling for Good Housekeeping, Feb 2015

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  • 02/02/15--09:06: Dear John
  • Hours later I am still stupidly emotional about Sherlock signing it Sherlock.

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  • 02/02/15--09:34: Dear John
  • janeymac-ie:


    Hours later I am still stupidly emotional about Sherlock signing it Sherlock.

    Ooh, yes. This. And I’m so worried for him. For them both.

    I know it’s going to take a while. A damn sight longer than it did in the show but shit I want them to love each other. God. Why can’t they just love each other?

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    I know, right?

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    aries: *deletes it*
    taurus: *turns off anon for a while*
    gemini: i'll hack u
    cancer: *cries*
    leo: haha k
    virgo: i don't deserve this
    libra: um, excuse you
    scorpio: come off anon and fight me
    sagittarius: lmao looks like someone is too scared to come off anon
    capricorn: *laughs while replying to the hate*
    aquarius: first of all, how dare you
    pisces: *corrects your spelling errors*

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  • 02/02/15--10:24: Photo

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    jesus christ



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    Women Agreeing With Compliments Men Gave Them Online, And It Didn’t Go Well.See more here. 

    I always agree w/them when they compliment me, picks out the fuckboys real fast.

    they think pulling out the appearance compliments are going to get them somewhere so theyre pissed it didnt work. theyre pissed you dont hate yourself and make them work harder to get what they think theyre entitled to

    A prospective suitor of mine once ‘complimented’ me by saying I don’t need plastic surgery…. when I said “I know,” the awkward, stung silence on his part

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    Someone take my grindr away.

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    this man spent 1.5 HOURS polishing this table!

    he got a HUGE applause when he was done- and judging from the smile on his face he greatly appreciated it.

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    Well played, Netflix. (image via marthafarcuss)

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  • 02/02/15--14:49: Photo

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    true star of the superbowl god bless

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    ‘‘She’s not a groupie. She’s someone who is going to be brave and do something she really wants to do — and she does.’’(9 kisses)

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    Rare early 20th century erotica watercolor of a male youth with a faun (possibly Pan). 7 1/2 x 6 1/4 inches. Framed. Very good condition.

    Provenance: Ex-collection Michael Langford, Dallas, Texas

    Ancient Greek Johnlock AU?

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    Ben Affleck speaks about Islamophobia X

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    Vacuum salesman invited to teen with autism’s birthday party  

    CHESTERFIELD COUNTY, Va. — Since Dylan Green was 2 years old, he has had a passion for vacuum cleaners.

    Dylan, who has autism, was never into “normal” toys, his mother Jodie told WTVR.

    The middle school student turned 14 over the weekend and celebrated his birthday with a party that included close friends, family and a vacuum salesman.

    In an effort to help make her son’s birthday special, Dylan’s mother sent an email to the Kirby Company, the Cleveland-based makers of the Kirby vacuum.

    “I am reaching out to you in hopes for an answer to an unusual request for my son who is autistic. He has always been obsessed with vacuum cleaners. His favorite is the Kirby. He spends hours every day watching videos on his tablet about different Kirby’s. When he isn’t watching videos about them, he is talking about them. I really would LOVE to get a demo done for him for his birthday. In fact, I am even getting him a cake made that looks like a Kirby vacuum. I am writing to you in hopes that you can get me in touch with a way to get him this demo. I want to be clear that I do not intend on purchasing a Kirby. I was hoping that I could pay a flat fee or thought that maybe if you have salesmen in training that needs to get in practice demos for training purposes. I do not want anything free, but as the mother of a special needs child, it is so hard to find things to make my son happy. I know that having this demo done would just be so awesome, and it would warm my heart to see him so excited to experience that.”

    The company received Jodie’s email and made her son’s birthday dream come true.

    In addition to sending Dylan a soccer ball, a hat and a T-shirt with the Kirby logo, a Kirby salesman traveled from Fredericksburg to Chesterfield to perform a vacuum demonstration at the party.

    “He knew more about the Kirby than I did,” an obviously impressed Al Archie said. “I have never experienced anything like that.”

    Archie, who has been selling vacuums for Kirby for 25 years, said he was moved by Dylan’s knowledge and was taken aback by photos of a much younger Dylan dressed up as a vacuum salesman.

    “I imagine it was like a sports fan meeting one of his idols, like Michael Jordan,” Archie said.

    Archie also had a surprise for Dylan.

    “At the end of the demonstration [he] gave my son a brand new Kirby vacuum,” Jodie Greene said. “There was not a dry eye in the house.”

    Kirby vacuums are not a cheap, but Archie said he decided to get one for Dylan as a way to celebrate the child’s passion.

    “I planned I wanted to do something for him,” Archie said. “[It was] an opportunity to give something back.”

    Jodie Greene said her son has been over the moon ever since his birthday surprise.

    “I’m going to have the cleanest carpets in Chesterfield County,” she joked.

    that is the goofiest special interest i have ever heard. i say that as an autistic who cannot shut up about yarn. vacuum cleaners? how do you even get into that in the first place?

    … god i love humanity. we are so interesting.

    I love stuff like this that sharply contradicts the popular notion that autistic kids are worthless cuz they’ll Never Have Jobs since they’re not Normal— like this fourteen year old kid knew more than a salesman with decades of experience. He impressed the shit out of that salesman, he treated that guy like a rockstar and I bet that’ll be remembered. If he’s still into Kirby vacuums in another eight years— and why not! I bet vacuums are pretty damn neat once you really have a look— why shouldn’t he go and work for the company? Surely having someone around with an offhand encyclopedic knowledge of the product and a wildly sincere passion for it also is gonna be useful as fuck to some process.

    And if not, because money isn’t everything, then hey, his mom is gonna have the cleanest carpets ever for the rest of her life, and so might whatever partners he has. Maybe he can spend his life unemployed but happily cleaning all his friends’ carpets and that’s cool too. I’d fucking love for someone to vacuum stuff for me, I hate it. 


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